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Mr. Bambu

aka Narcissistic Cannibal

  • I live in the dark space in between the doors
  • I was born on January 31
  • My occupation is to make unfunny jokes and cry late at night wondering why my wife left me
  • I am tired
  • Bio sometimes its nice to just lay back and revel in silence knowing with absolute certainty that around the next corner, tomorrow is just gonna smack you in the face with a 2x4, and there's nothing you can do about it. so enjoy the now, brothas. steak-umm bless.
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  • Mr. Bambu

    Do you ever just look at someone dealing 200 damage in a round and think "...I can do better"? Some people have. Basically this druid summoned up a tsunami to wipe out an enormous fire elemental. 


    The page states they calculated the given tsunami to have 30,000,000 gallons in it, or 113562.354 m^3 of water. Density of pure water (this was created so I will assume it is pure) is 1000 kg/m^3. 

    Mass = 113562354 kg

    Speed, according to a quick Google search, is over 800 kmh, or 222.22 m/s. 

    KE = 0.5m * v^2 = 2.806e12 Joules, 'Multi-City Block level'+. Oof. 


    Tsunami Druid Summons Tsunami: 670.65 Tons of TNT, Multi-City Block level

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  • Mr. Bambu

    Homebrew Scaling Chains

    February 19, 2019 by Mr. Bambu

    This blog is a stand-alone place for scaling and stats for the D&D Homebrew. Please note inconsistencies will arise- characters may fight beings that are statistically stronger than them and not get absolutely mauled because the game is quite literally the embodiment of game mechanics. 

    So forgive that if it arises. This aims to fix any inconsistencies that are currently fixable. For all intents and purposes, Striking Strength and Durability generally perfectly mirror Attack Potency.


    Levels: 1-4

    Attack Potency: Wall level+ (Scales to Burning Hands at 1.94 kg of TNT)

    Speed: Subsonic (Scales to arrow dodging at 37.31 m/s)

    Lifting Strength: At least Athletic Human, possibly Peak Human (Many adventurers can lift about 135 kg above their heads with ease, and …



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  • Mr. Bambu

    This thing does the opposite of atomization- it breaks down strange matter to duplicate any item in the game except for some.

    We're gonna calc the AP of it. This is roughly Tier 3 equivalent technology. 


    It can supposedly be used to replicate blocks of diamonds, so a basic calc for atomization of a cubic meter of diamond is in order.

    Volume = 1e6 cm^3 

    The value for atomization of diamonds is 210081 j/cc, so...

    Energy = 2.101e11 Joules, City Block level

    Not a bad supporting feat for the existing Multi-City Block level feat for Tier 3 equivalent tech.


    Atomic Assembler Replicates Diamonds: 50.22 Tons of TNT, City Block level

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  • Mr. Bambu

    This thing is like the Thermobaric Charge but way fucking bigger. It can kill from hundreds of meters and pulverizes the earth around it at a decent radius. We're gonna take a look for the third key for the Voltz Mod character. 


    So FANDOM is blocking my scaling images. Oh well. We'll use Imgur then.

    So two blocks is equal to 8 pixels in the one image, and the explosion devastates a diameter of 105 pixels in the second. Since this is directly stated to be like the thermobaric charge, we'll apply pulverization of iron at that radius. Halve diameter, obviously. 

    Two Blocks = 8 px = 2 m

    Blast Diameter = 105 px = 26.25 m

    Halve for 13.125 m radius. Volume of such a sphere would be 9470.8 m^3. 

    Volume of Iron = 9470800000 cm^3

    Pulverization of Iron = 90…


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  • Mr. Bambu

    This Tier 2 explosive incinerates everything in the area. We'll assume pulverization and use iron since that's what is in the picture.


    The explosive has radius of 2.5 meters of solid iron. We'll use a sphere even though that's sorta not how Minecraft works.

    Volume of Sphere = 65.45 m^3

    Subtract 1 m^3 for the explosive itself. 

    Destruction of Iron = 90 j/cc

    Energy = 5.801e9 Joules, Building level+

    Neato libido man. Small upgrade from their last position. 


    Thermobaric Explosive Explodes: 1.39 Tons of TNT, Building level+

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